Do romantic movies ruin relationships?

Reblogging because it’s just so applicable to my last post…and because I just love this subject 🙂

Anita's Desk...

One of my fb friends made an interesting statement in one of his posts. He said, “Please I would like to hear your opinion on this one. Romantic movies ruin relationships. They give women unrealistic expectations about what to expect from men. Porn has the same effect on men.”  Things that make you go… hmmmmm.

Okay, don’t even try to get me involved in a ‘porn’ conversation.  Nope!  Forget about that.  However, I must admit… I don’t read romance novels and I don’t watch romantic movies (though, I have seen a few), so I hadn’t really thought about this much at all.  So, I decided to write about it.  🙂  Here is a comment from one of his male friends…

“There’s another outlook that we need to consider. How has romantic movies contributed to people falling madly in love. It definitely influences man & woman alike. Men need to look at…

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Sometimes a lady just wants to be loved HER way.

I have the title, where do I begin with this one?!

You know when you first start seeing each other and you do things like go out for dinner, romantic dancing out under the stars, you ring her 3 times a day and say things like “I can’t wait to see you tonight”….you do the lovely things that hook the beautiful lady of your dreams? Then when things start getting really serious, like this has a future in it serious and the guy says things like “Please just don’t try and change me, I hate that” and the lady really, honestly believes there is nothing to change, you two perfect are perfect together….

Well, today I am thinking about this and thinking I would like to change my man, back into the guy I MET! Life happens, the novelty of first attraction wears off a little and you settle into ‘happily-ever-after’, we work, do the chores, find interests, meet people…live. And somewhere along the line romantic dancing under the stars ends. People change all by themselves.

My husband and I are best mates, we truly love each other and I am so thankful I found him. But he also infuriates me, I’m sure I infuriate him too, he just reins it in better than I do 🙂  His idea of bliss and togetherness is feeling cosy enough to fall asleep on the sofa each night, with his head on my lap, usually half way through conversation. Early. So I am left stuck, watching whatever crap he flicked around to on the TV and unable to reach the remote he is often lying on. Aw, so cosy! This is love his way.

Sometimes I would like it my way. I am sure most of us could say this, men and women. I can only speak for women, actually I can only speak for me. I would like the romance to continue – I would like the dancing under the stars bit to never end. Ladies like romance and fluff. They don’t like to be left sitting on their own, held captive by someone snoring, watching sport they don’t like. And when they do moan about it they don’t like to be told “We said we’d never try and change each other….REMEMBER!!”

This is my third time around with a man and I am left wondering…..is the dancing only bait? Men have a hard time understanding women I know. And here I will say a very female thing – women sometimes have a hard time feeling loved enough at some empty place in their soul that only being loved enough can fill. Being loved their way, just often enough to keep their hearts happy. Women think from their hearts, by the time the thought reaches the head it’s generally distorted by pissed off and doesn’t get expressed very well – but in their hearts they just want to feel loved enough. That’s all.

My husband bought me a plaque a few years ago. It reads “Woman are made to be loved, not understood”. He was so proud of that, he finally figured he would never figure it all out. I love him very much and this is a good thing.